They can take your status, but they can never take your dignity
All in Family
I’m Still Alive, Why Do You Ask?
My mortality is always in question
Something In the Way They Move
How many Lukes to move the world?
How an Earache Sent Me to The Hospital
When everyone you know tells you go to the doctor – go to the doctor
Why Is Toxic Behavior Considered Masculine?
We have come a long way from standing on a hillside buying each other a Coke
Be Selfish for the New Year: Part Two
I was right by the Dunkin’ Donuts kiosk, so moved over to order.
The Devil Is Not Fire’s Only Friend
What is our fascination with the dancing flames?
From Sad Santa to Bad Santa
How times have changed.
A Visit to My Parents That Was a Long Time Coming
It’s not like they were going anywhere
Birthday Surprises Over the Years
But the real surprise is who continues to give them
Tom Waits for No Man
He sat at the piano, the perpetual cigarettes in the ashtray just above the piano keys — each devoured in two long draws
A Very Black Friday
Why you should never drive with dogs, even if they have a license.
The Most Eventful Weekend of My Life
The moments flew by me fast
Following Directions is an Art Form
And, why is that man naked?
When the Universe Calls, Don't Let it Go to Voice Mail
When there are signs, you should follow them, otherwise you’ll never know where you might end up
Dinner with My Daughter Revealed the Difference Between Us
A vegetarian and a non-vegetarian walked into a bar…
Will Work For Scotch
Bring in the dog and put out the cat
Born With An Expiration Date
My premonition on the day I’m going to die
A Road Show, an Art Show, and Public Indecency
More Than Art Was on Display in Brooklyn
How I Stopped Wasting Money on Greeting Cards
My Battle Against the Greeting Card Industry Turned Into a Political Statement