The Perfect Formula For Love
I met a woman (welcome to the club, Al), but I thought there might be a problem.
She is younger than me (mind out of the gutter, people).
She is in her fifties, and I am in my sixties.
At my age, I’m not sure where the appropriate cutoff is when asking a woman on a date.
Surprisingly, the women I asked for advice on this matter had no problem with the age gap.
Even with that reassurance, I didn’t want to embarrass myself and be that guy. You know, the one who doesn’t respect, or know, his limits.
But fortunately for me, there is a formula for doing just that.
Who knew?
Well, apparently on Christmas Eve I had dinner with someone who knew exactly what that was.
Even after the divorce, we still spent Christmas Eve as a family. We would get together at a restaurant and eat before mass. As my kids grew older, people important in their lives joined us at that table.
After dinner, when all the adults left for mass, it was just me and the kids (all over thirty).
Now, at a table full of thirty-somethings, I told them about the woman and my concerns about dating someone younger.
Once again, the general consensus was that there was no problem with the age gap.
I guess the confused look on my face prompted one of my son’s friends to blurt out something I had never heard of before.
“You know,” he said, “there’s a formula for that.”
If I was confused before, now I was simply dumbfounded.
A formula for love?
Yes, and here it is:
Take your age, divide it in half, and add seven years.
or
Minimum age = AGE/2 + 7
It’s as simple as that.
The reassurance about the formula was that the woman I met was within my age range, which would have been great.
Except, between the time I met her and today, she has shown no interest in me at all.
In the end, it really didn’t matter.
Even though when I first met her there were texts, emails, and calls between us, after a short time it just stopped.
Realistically, I shouldn’t have been surprised…
…I was never any good in math.
