It's Nice To Be Nice To The Nice
People are like coins, we have two sides.
Heads, we are good, and tails, maybe we are not so good.
Not evil (well, maybe some are), just traits we try to hide from the public.
Heads, we are loyal, generous, kind, patient, and honest.
Tails, we are envious, jealous, defensive, insecure, and arrogant.
So in life, we do our best to show the heads side of our personalities and hide the tails side of our coin for as long as possible.
You know where we do this best?
When we date.
Nothing in life feels more like a flip of a coin than when we meet people we would like to date. And we hope that coin flip comes up heads every time.
With dating, this is where I get confused about what is considered a heads trait or a tails trait.
I have heard this for years about myself, about what trait I should hide from the women I would like to date.
I have heard this from both men and women.
The problem I have when I’m dating?
I’m too nice.
This has always confused me.
My whole life, nice was a good thing.
Somehow, in the dating world, nice is a detriment.
Let me be clear, I am not saying I am nice (well, I am nice). What I’m saying is this is the comment I get most from people when I talk about my dating life (or lack thereof).
How nice am I?
I once asked a woman if she wanted to go out, get coffee, or a drink.
She thought about it for a few seconds then responded, “No, I don’t think so, but thanks for asking. Makes me feel good that you did.”
See, even in rejection, I’m doing something nice for someone else.
Of course, I’m sure there are a multitude of reasons a woman would not like to go out with me (too long to list here).
My friend Joe says I’m not nice, but I am obsequious.
(Look it up)
I may never understand the reason, but I’m too old to change or start to play games (as some have suggested).
I don’t agree with Joe, instead, I would rather live my life by the immortal words of Major Frank Burns (M*A*S*H):
It’s nice to be nice to the nice.
