No one wants to die in a stupid way. Something that will end up a punch line of their life once they are gone. Preferably, I would like to die in my sleep and, one night a few years ago, I almost got my wish.
All in Drinking
Life in the Form of a Question
Each Monday night a group of us play trivia at a bar in Annandale (New Jersey). Its a big bar and a very friendly group of teams.
That is, it was until last Monday.
Meet Cleo, the Crazy Christmas Clown
We can all agree, clown dolls are creepy.
OK, lets move on.
It’s The Summer of Seventy-Nine
It’s the end of October, outside my window the leaves have changed, the nights come quick, so what better time to talk about a shore house my friends and I rented during the summer of nineteen-seventy-nine in Seaside Heights, New Jersey.
Punch Drunk Love
Author’s note: By the end of this post, I come off as the bad guy (for good reason).
Putting the FUN in Funeral
Things people talk about at funerals
Just Wrap Yourself In Plastic And Go
It was a long way down from the top of that hill and you had to navigate through an army of spruce trees that tried their best to keep you from completing your run. I had seen many friends fly face first into the open arms of a waiting spruce only to appear on the other side with exposed skin scrapped raw and smelling like Christmas.
A Christmas Tradition From Years Ago
With all the traditions that come with this time of year, there is one in particular that my friends and I have not celebrated since we started having kids and the holidays became all about them (thanks for ruining Christmas, kids).
I Have Arrived
So, there I was, living in New York City, working in the financial district, having gotten a trainee position at an international insurance company and thinking “Wow, kid, you done good”.
Pluto, You Will Always be a Planet to Me
They can take your status, but they can never take your dignity
I’m Still Alive, Why Do You Ask?
My mortality is always in question
How an Earache Sent Me to The Hospital
When everyone you know tells you go to the doctor – go to the doctor
Tom Waits for No Man
He sat at the piano, the perpetual cigarettes in the ashtray just above the piano keys — each devoured in two long draws
This Food is So Good It Lives in a Castle
Just be sure the castle has a throne
Down the Shore Everything’s Alright
Me and Myself on a Sunday Night
We All Want That Meet-Cute Story to Tell
You Never Know When Someone Will Change Your Life
The Key To Surviving Old Age
Health Care takes a back seat to finding a really good parking spot
The One Trip I Didn't Plan To Take
There were always drugs around, however, most of my friends and I were big drinkers. Beers, Tequila, Jack Daniels – we basically drank like grumpy old men. In high school, I wasn’t much of a drinker (I have since made up for that).
Call Waiting For Godot
At one point, after being asked for the umpteenth time if I was ‘OK’ I thought that at least if it looked like I was waiting for someone, I wouldn’t appear so suicidal. That’s when it hit me.